Caged chickens should be banned

In Room 1 we have been learning how to structure. We were writing about children under 12 should be allowed a phone and this time we wrote about caged chickens. Our success criteria was Write a title that tells the reader about the issue being argued, use a rhetorical question, write an introduction that includes my three main points, organise my ideas into paragraphs, make sure each paragraph has a main point and two examples, write a conclusion that includes my three main points, edit for spelling and punctuation and present my work to a pair for assessment. Here is my one.

Would you like to be a caged chicken? Of course not. That's why  I firmly believe that caged chickens should be banned. 

One of the main reasons why chickens shouldn't be caged is that they get squashed there are 82% chickens caged out of 2.3 million. Each hen has a space of an A4 piece of paper. In one shed of chickens there are 4.5,000 caged. 

My second name point is that they get diseases. They get fatty liver disease. They get rickets / no vitamin D. They also get osteoporosis. 

My third name point is that they can't act  natural they can't stretch for food they can't have a dust bath. they can't perch. They can't flap their wings will stretch their legs. They can't fly. They can't build a nest. They can't peck. They can even end up dying at 18 months old.

In conclusion I believe that caged chickens should be banned. Because they get diseases, they can't act natural and they get squashed.